This is where you will post a picture of yourself, a brief description of who you are, and upload your essay.
While your introduction is very interesting, find a way to use the information you gave but make it less descriptive and more persuasive.
You have good points in your body paragraphs but make sure you elaborate thoroughly.
Make sure you go through all of the benefits and try to end it with a better ending statement.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.