This is where you will post a picture of yourself, a brief description of who you are, and upload your essay.
It was ok besides your word fluency is not the greatest. also your sentence fluency was also very confusing.
1. your paper did not have a attentio getter
trouble finding your thesis
kinda you had points but did not discuss well.
you need to get a trasition to keep the flow going
you need a eye catcher to lead people in to your idea.
explain your details more explain in greater detail.
you need to add some transtions.
I had a hard time finding your thesis.
Your points were good but it was hard to follow along when you were sumarizing.
i felt your paper just left me thinking with a thought in my head.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.